I wish i could finally rest...

It would really just be putting me out of my misery, really.
There's no need to feel sad about it, i "died" long ago, anyway.
No person should live a life like this.
Having to force this human body to stay alive, what did i do to deserve this punishment?
Morbid.
You cannot choose everything about your life, just because you can move and become independent.
I have become loneliness incarnate.
I'm tired, have been so for 10 years, each one worse than the previous, i can't still believe it, what my life has become.
Tired of my life, of my body, of my "family", of my house, of being alone, of being lonely, of being sick, of being poor, of being rejected, of being in hell, of being living a nightmare, of being alive.
Obviously, if i could kill myself i wouldn't be writing this shit, i'd be long gone, and it would be fine.
I'm still waiting for my time to come, life is so long, i wish i don't come back anymore.
There's no other reason for me being alive, than to experience more suffering, how much i can swallow before i explode.
If i could die today...
It would be fine.

Day of the Week and its Planet - 4 - Wednesday - Mercury

"I truly care and i try hard, but Life always ends up making me realize i am cursed to be alone forever, because if i don't initiate a conversation then not even one person ever talks to me or remembers me, and i always end up being forgotten or abandoned once i stop giving attention, so i feel no joy in being alive, no happiness, no good feelings, receive nothing good from anyone, can't even accept them anymore, have no will to try again, don't know what to do anymore, all i keep seeing in my future is a slow, miserable, and painful death, which i never wanted, and what did i do to deserve it?"